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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]And what is she buying him) [/quote]

There is not tradition in our culture of buying men engagement rings.

This is not a business negotiation.

[b]Your transactional approach to how you express your eternal love to someone[/b] is pretty scarey. [/quote]

NP.  Women demanding a ring to barter her fertility and youth in marriage (quoting OP here) is traditional and sentimental but men getting a gift from a woman upon engagement is transactional?

Make it make sense.[/quote]

The bean counting of “she gets a ring, what do I get??” will doom a marriage. You can’t go into it with that attitude. That’s what leads to chore charts and sexlessness and resentment.

And FWIW, I know many women who got their H’s engagement gifts, myself included. It may not be as expensive or flashy as a ring, but it was something with sentimental value that they treasured. [/quote]

You still haven't explained why it's only bean-counting in one direction but not in the other.  Why is her "you want my fertility, where is my ring?" not bean counting?  She's literally saying his love is not enough (or is not real love) without getting her an expensive ring to make it worth her while.  That's transactional by definition.  [/quote]

You are missing the point. What men and women give early on in marriage is not commensurate. The woman gives something that can never be restored, regained or recaptured if the marriage does not last. The man can move on pretty easily and start again. What OP was saying is that she is staking much more than a trivial ring is worth.[/quote]

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