Reply to When someone contacts you about being excluded from social events

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Groups of friends who click form naturally; it doesn't make the people in the group nasty or mean or malicious. It's called life. Good lord.[/quote]

This is a neighborhood group of 12 or so, not “friends” in the true sense. The only thing that needs to click is that they are moms in the same geographic area. Yes, some kids will get along more than others, and those families may click MORE than some others, but they are still part of the group at large. Surely there is room for one more at their table and at least one other mom in the group this other mom would click with.

And stop with the “because their kids play together”. At that age, they play together because they know each other, or their parents do.

I think OP gets a kick out of being one of the cool moms in the group. It takes two hot seconds to try to include this woman in events, or to put friend in touch with other people in the group. [/quote]

I'm the OP. Wow. I didn't expect this thread to generate such major controversy. I pretty much resent the fact that you think I get a "kick" out of this. Could you explain why you think that? This is the attitude that infects these forums, so deeply cruel and judgmental for the anonymous sake of it. You don't know me. You don't know anything about me beyond a post on a forum. Yet you feel comfortable judging my motivations, judging who I am, when I am trying to look out for someone and be kind and came here asking for advice. You have a lot of nerve.

I have a busy career and a busy life that extends far beyond my neighborhood. I came here asking for opinions because I don't know how to handle a situation where I'd like to do the right thing by someone I care about without feeling guilty when I cannot control every aspect of someone's social life. I invite this person places, go as her "wingperson" -- by driving her -- and always suggest including her when a big thing. But do you understand that when someone hosts a child's BIRTHDAY PARTY -- I cannot just insist they modify the guest list? Do you know how awkward that is? And do you know how badly I feel that this woman, my friend, does feel excluded?? And how upsetting it is to get angry texts when she sees an event and believes I have the power to fix it for her?

I don't get a "kick" out of this. You need to stop watching reality TV or something.[/quote]

+1000[/quote]

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