Reply to How do people afford kids?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is why the average age of first time moms in DC is 38. Lots of women spend a decade working on their careers, paying off all debts, building lots of equity in homes, and THEN having children. [/quote]

That is sad[/quote]

Nope. Sad is being 45, an empty nester and having no employable skills.[/quote]
Where I'm from most woman don't work. They have children very young and are usually done having kids by 25. By 35 they are usually taking care of grandkids if their daughters stay in school after getting pregnant at age 15. [/quote]

Now THAT is truly sad.[/quote]
I think the values are different family comes first. Guys work for money to support a middle class lifestyle and everyone lives off of 60k easily. No eat race and waiting to have kids. The kids usually come first.  I don't find it sad at all. [/quote]

I don't think kids are more important than other things in life, such as educational and professional accomplishment and financial security.[/quote]

Now THAT'S sad---to find meaning in life through professional accomplishment.  A truly empty---and more likely than not---forgettable existence. [/quote]

Said by someone without a particularly fulfilling job.

I have kids and am (imho) professionally successful.  I have friends with very full lives that do not have children for a variety of reasons and lead very fulfilling lives.  Your way is not the only way and I hope you are raising your children to be more open minded than yourself.

Personally I find the pressure to find a spouse early troubling (assuming the goal is to have kids in your 20s) and think it contributes to the number of failing marriages.  I did not marry until 38 and if that had meant we could not have kids well I would not have been willing to compromise in my choice of spouse just in order to have kids.  I feel lucky to have a wonderful family and successful career.  I feel like I won the lottery when I stop and think about it and I went through student loans and high childcare bills.  We are on the other side of both now with two great kids in very good public schools.  We are  comfortable but not rich by DC standards, but we do fine and we are happy we have been able to make it work in DC.

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