Reply to Size 14, pretty face, 215 pounds. Would you date me?

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Reply to "Size 14, pretty face, 215 pounds. Would you date me?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Fat OP here- Went on 4 dates in a row (every night) with him and then today he said he didn't want to see me anymore. Our dates were all 6-8hrs long.  We slept together last night and he just texted me now.  So you're all right.  I'm disgusting.  Fine.

Focusing on myself now and the weight loss, not for men but for myself.  Like everyone said, when I lose weight I'll have a bigger pool if men to choose from and maybe then I won't find an asshole.[/quote]

Please, please do not call yourself disgusting because you believed some guy who CLEARLY demonstrated interest in you, and then turned out to be just in it for sex. The way he behaved has absolutely nothing to do with your size, and everything to do with him. Before you go, "yeah, sure" and stop reading this post  - think about it: Do you have any friends who are smaller than you? Have you never seen them get screwed over, blown off, cheated on, used for sex? I speak from experience. I am smaller than my BFF, who is a plus size lady. When we first met, I was not dating, and she was. Each time she had a bad experience, she'd say - this wouldn't happen if I looked like you. In the past 2 or so years I have been on the market, she has had her eyes opened watching me go through the exact same nonsense she endured.

Speaking from my/her experience: It's true that your available pool of men will open up if you lose weight, but this won't necessarily correlate to the proportion of quality guys going up. You're still going to meet lousy ones, get treated badly, and have to do the work of digging out the good ones. The biggest difference I can pinpoint is because SHE felt bad about her size, she'd put up with more crap from guys, like "Oh, I have to take them treating me badly or lose weight." That sounds like your immediate reaction too - like this guy would have otherwise been a fabulous, stand-up guy, who'd have behaved like a gentleman if only you'd been 160 lbs. Um, no. He'd still be the same guy he is.  As for my friend,  she's getting married this summer to a guy who treats her like a queen, is more than 5 years younger, and is a designated professional. And she never lost any weight, and has probably gained some since they've been together.

Re: your weight- do what you want to do for yourself - your health, if you want to be more active, change how you look in clothes, whatever. But if you lose weight expecting that all Prince Charmings and no frogs will be your experience going forward, you're going to be disappointed. [/quote]

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