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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here ...This whole thing is so out of character for dH who has always been a "good guy."  He is nice; he is nerdy and shy.  He has a good gov't job.  He was not a big socializer...Just a normal regular guy.  Maybe it is a mid life crisis.  Plus I think he had a crush on this woman way back when they did work together.  We had just gotten married back then and she was just getting divorced.  So the whole crush thing is very worrisome.  he said to me - oh, we have so much in common (as friends) - we grew up on the same area; we both had horses, etc etc.  And I'm like - what am I chopped liver??? He did seem very fascinated by her.  
I'll keep you posted in more dribbles come out...I am a little bit hopeful and a little bit wary.  [/quote]

It is often the "nice" "nerdy" guys who did nto get an oppotunity to do this when they were single, and are going to take it now. And yes, he IS fascinated by her. He talks to her on the phone for hours. He is willing to leave his wife on her advice. She is in charge here, OP. If you think your one phone call to her is going to turn this whole thing around, well....

Bottom line. You have to get access to the emails and texts, print them, and take them to a lawyer to get a base line assessment of what your options are. Then perhaps you won't feel so helpless in the situation and can muster up some self respect.[/quote]

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