Reply to No birthday present- break up with him?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'd drop him. The men I know who don't make the effort with their significant others to recognize their birthdays and anniversaries are selfish and self-absorbed. ADHD is not an excuse. You deserve better. [/quote]

But they went out to dinner! He probably thought that *was* recognizing it. Because it is.[/quote]

OP here. Ok fine, I’ll bite. I had to ask him when we were going out for my birthday because he didn’t proactively set something up. And then he planned a dinner last minute, was late picking me up, and at dinner he said he meant to bring flowers but ran out of time and looked really sheepish like he knew he was not bringing his A game.[/quote]

Did he have a reason he was late/distracted? Has the relationship simply run its course?[/quote]

If I were in my twenties, I would never accept this lack of effort. It all kind of sounds like he isn’t into OP.

Unfortunately, OP is now a divorced middle aged woman. I’m not sure if OP wants children. It doesn’t sound like she does.

It doesn’t sound like this is a good match and OP should move on.

I have a friend who is twice divorced. She also highly values gift giving. She was like OP divorced in her mid thirties and married a guy who went all out with gifts and flowers. He was very grand in gestures. Then the gestured stopped after they got married and he left her.

There were many less grand guys who she probably thought were low effort. She could be married with kids but she went for the grand gift giving man.

She seems to have less and less options now in her late forties. She still refused to settle and wants everything. [/quote]

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