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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I saw this in my own Asian family.  Here is how it went down:

Son:  I am interested in music.  I think I like to play the guitar.

Mom:  Why would you want to learn that instrument?  They are for poor people.  We're going to purchase a Steinway grand piano, and you're going to get weekly piano lessons.  In addition to that, I am going to sign you up for piano competition events.  You must finish in the top three, and if you fail to do that, you will not be allowed to hang out with your friends.  You will be judged against other Asian kids, and do not make me look bad.

Son:  I love watching Novak Djokovic play tennis.  He is the best tennis player.

Mom:  I am going to enroll you into tennis bootcamps along with expensive private tennis lessons.  You have to enter tournaments and become the best player in your age group.  Other Asian parents posted on WeChat that their kids won tournaments, and I expect the same thing from you.  If you have to give up time to hang out with your friends, so be it.

Son:  I love art.  I think it is cool.

Mom:  I am going to sign you up for USArts.  I expect you to be the best art student in your age group.  I also expect you to come up with an art portfolio so that we can use it to enter art competitions.  Other Asian parents brag about their kids winning art competitions, so I expect the same thing from you.

Son:  I heard a lot about TJ.  I would like to know more.

Mom:  I am going to enroll you in Sunshine academy or Best academy.  That way, they will prepare you for TJ prep exams.  I expect you to be at TJ five years from now.

Son:  Mom, now that college commencement is over, I would like to move as far from you as I can.  Thank you for making my childhood a living hell.[/quote]

There is an Indian comedian who is a mom and does skits about this and her kids participate in the videos. Pretty funny stuff and I always get the feeling that her kids are okay with her demands. [/quote]

There are so many reasonable Asian American parents. Imagine if other races took the worst of white American parenting as an example and made sweeping generalizations about all white parents. Or black parents or Latino parents.  [/quote]

Eh. I’m an Asian (Indian) millennial and grew up with immigrant parents. It’s a stereotype for a reason. My parents were actually awesome and nothing like this, and they’re an outlier among my peers as far as I can tell. I was never forced to play an instrument, they weren’t particularly pushy about grades, they weren’t strict, let me drink at home, let boyfriends sleep over (when I was in college and after, didn’t come up before then) and basically acted like reasonably permissive white parents. And I turned out absolutely fine.

They had a pretty big social circle (of other Indian immigrants) when I was growing up, and I’m lifelong friends with many of their kids. I was definitely the best adjusted among them all when we were growing up. And they all always wanted to come hang out at my house when we were growing up because their parents were way more strict, and all still love my parents for being normal. But the point is, they were extremely different from the other Asian parents I knew. So while obviously I know there are normal ones, I think a large percentage are like what is being described here.[/quote]

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