Reply to Grandparents told DS to "just stop" regarding calls and texts to help rebook flights

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Reply to "Grandparents told DS to "just stop" regarding calls and texts to help rebook flights"

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I have empathy for your situation. It’s disappointing when holiday plans don’t work out, especially as the last three holiday seasons have been very difficult for travel and gatherings for various reasons. It’s ok to be in your feelings that your parents don’t want to accept the travel solutions that you feel are reasonable.

However, it’s also ok for your parents to be stressed about traveling and busy at work. I’ve definitely turned down “good” opportunities for things like travel or concerts because making the logistics work for me at that particular time was just too challenging. It’s a value judgement that’s personal. No one can convince anyone else to prioritize things in the same way they do. When someone gives you a boundary, don’t hound them for reasons and provide item-by-item refutation (airport, costs, etc.). Just let people tell you “no” and respect their decision. You don’t have to like it, but the best way of showing love and trust is to let other adults make the decisions that work for them.

Regarding your son, address his concerns: “I’m sorry you’re disappointed that your grandparents aren’t coming; I understand that it felt crummy to be scolded by your grandmother, and she could have been gentler in her approach; though you were trying to be helpful, and your motivations came from a good place, sometimes it’s confusing and stressful when too many people are trying to contact each other by text and call at the same time. Let the adults manage things, and we will let you know if we want your help.”[/quote]

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