Reply to SAHMs that never return to workforce?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You should do you. The value that you add to your family and kids is difficult to measure - but it's significant. Society should value it more.

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Who cares what "society" thinks. The value is entirely maintained within the family system - it's not like "society" reaps some benefit from this decision. But there is no need for external validation, is there? [/quote]

Society absolutely benefits from this decision.[/quote]

With women staying home indefinitely? I don't think so. It papers over holes in our social infrastructure but my life isn't any better because someone decides not to work ever again.

I still think it's a totally fine choice to make, and that if you have the luxury of being able to make that choice then cheers to you and to your family![/quote]

Just because you can't see what these people are doing to benefit your life doesn't mean they aren't. I don't see you doing anything to benefit them either, but I'm sure your paid labor has some social value beyond the economic. Similarly their unpaid labor has both social and economic value. If you suddenly removed every SAHP from society, what do you image would happen? You note that they "paper[] over holes in our social infrastructure" as if that were a minor thing easily fixed by ... what? Capitalism? Socialism? If every one of them were required to enter the paid workforce tomorrow, you really think nothing bad would come of that? Read some feminist critiques of Marx as a starting point. An economic model that fails to include the unpaid labor in society is obviously deficient, as is failing to recognize the inequality of pay across diverse workers. Similarly a failure to include non-bankable benefits of a variety of social roles is tunnel vision over-emphasizing currency as a measure of life and society. [/quote]

I hear you in the case of low income families. But in this case OP simply has the financial means not to have to work even if her family doesn't need her home. That's what she told us - and it's why she says she's struggling a little with the decision. There's no positive externality to that.

But I also think it's a perfectly valid decision to make! That's why I say: who cares what society thinks of the decision. I think it's silly to demand that society somehow recognize that OP is making a decision that's beneficial beyond her family - it's clearly not - but who cares? Have enough self-esteem and self-awareness to make the decision that works for you and your family, and not care if society's giving you a pat on the back while you're doing it.

It's basically the dream to not have to work - and not because your labor is so desperately needed at home that of course you can't be shared with a workplace. But because this is what you want to do, and you have the means to do it. THAT is freedom - and it's what OP is describing.[/quote]

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