Reply to "I won't date someone whose parents are divorced"

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Reply to ""I won't date someone whose parents are divorced""

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It is an immature thought.

You cannot make your marriage "divorce-proof" by only dating those whose parents are still together.  
[/quote]

This. It's like the person doesn't actually want to do the work of marriage. Thinks if they marry the right person they can be on auto pilot.[/quote]

Divorced parents is one of the best indicators of future divorce. It’s not everything, but it certainly is a data point[/quote]

Yep. [/quote]

I agree and it was a major Red flag I considered when I was madly in love with my husband when we met.  He was adamant his father and mother's volatile crappy marriage and divorce which included alcoholism and cheating meant he would never put his kids through that and he would be married for life, happily---basically give his kids the childhood he never had.  Successful, good-looking, ambitious, highly intelligent, perfectionist---everything about him was perfect and were infatuated with one another.  26 years old.  That sh*t blew up when our kids were the age he was when his dad walked out.  Reading everything I have and talking to therapist., he could not have handled that all on his own.  He should have been in therapy as a teen/young adult. Those scars and that trauma get suppressed and learning to compartmentalize and put on a fake persona to everyone (relatives, friends, etc) is engrained in little kids so that it is how they learn to live.   Trauma impacts brain development.

Most divorces stem from very dysfunctional homes.  That's why this data point is a huge indicator of future divorces, and a lot of time things are just wonderful until that man or woman hits obstacles or feels 'unloved' midlife and all of that sh*t from childhood and learning to escape or dull pain thru sex or booze and run away comes out.[/quote]

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