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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]And to the PP who is the daughter in law of Holocaust survivors, are they alive and able to speak to you about this? Their perspective would be interesting.

I am Jewish so I do not have the experience of being ostracized by my religion. But, if it were me, and it was important to me, I would push and shove my way on to every synagogue committee and light Shabbat candles every evening and show my family and community my full commitment to Judaism. How can you blame us for being wary? If you know our history you should understand this. [/quote]

push and shove where I am not wanted?  no thank you. if you want my son, you'll have to reach out. [/quote]

Dude. Get thee to a reform temple already if you are so obsessed with your son being recognized as Jewish because his father is Jewish. If you won’t, then it’s your choice so give it up already and stop acting like Jews formed a special group to persecute kids born to a non Jewish parent. No one is reaching out because you are bitter and insist that Jews sacrifice longstanding tenets of the faith to accommodate your disagreement with these traditions. Quite frankly you have no right to tell people what to believe. You can join or not, it’s up to you. There’s not some big cabal sorrowing at letting a kid slip through their misogynistic, convert-hating fingers. [/quote]

Fair enough. It's extremely frustrating and alienating to be told (in person and on here) that my kid isn't Jewish, so what's the point ... and I have had less-than-welcoming experiences in Reform settings as well.  Add that to being the party in the marriage responsible for religious education, and it's seeming basically impossible, no matter how much I try to explain to DH that his kid will not have any Jewish identity if we don't make an effort.  I feel a responsibility to educate him in his Jewish tradition but there's only so much I feel I can do. [/quote]

It sounds hard. I have to say though that if his own father who is Jewish doesn't care, then he's going to grow up knowing that and knowing that Judaism isn't important to his father. I don't know how old he is but you could send him to Hebrew (religious) school when he is 5 or 6 or older. That would give him a grounding at least. But if his dad really doesn't care, doesn't practice, and doesn't model it, I do agree that your son probably won't develop much of a Jewish identity because so much is modeled in the home. So much is transmitted in values and in talking about what it means to be Jewish and why our traditions are the way they are. That is more important than how often one attends synagogue. But Hebrew school would give him a chance, if it's important to you, and a Reform shul should be welcoming to him. Not every shul is the same -- if the ones you've been to seem exclusionary, post separately on this forum so people can suggest others.

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