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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]A close friend who tends to be more savvy about these things told me over a holiday get-together she knows some families in our school who hire private consultants who plan the kids’ whole life since 7th grade: help them apply to or even write essays for summer programs, plan sports (plan competition schedule and travel if it’s an individual sport without team schedule, summer skill camps at Ivies), school club leadership (how to recruit members, plan highly visible activities, manage their Instagram to document large gatherings, accomplishments), all the way down to drafting weekly emails for the kid to send to coaches, professors and college tour guides, band leaders they met on tours or summer programs over 4 years to establish relationships in a strategic and unannoying way. These are all before helping them ace the SAT and write their application essays.

Another friend told me last year (she had older kids and know many parents who have been through the process in the past decade) private consultants are useless, that the ones she knew who use them are getting into T25-50 colleges after spending tens of thousands, but not the most selective ones, because the top ones see through the consultants’ finger prints all over an app.

So which is true? I know as with a lot of cases, the answer is “it depends”, perhaps a great consultant could do those things. We have zero plan to use one (we don’t even have a tutor!) but I’m so disheartened that DC who works so hard to get top grades, work so hard on weekends at his part time job is competing under these circumstances. If that’s true, I want to take my kids out of the game and just apply to Canada, which is where DH is from, where you shouldn’t have to play these games to get in.

Anyone BTDT has real insights? [/quote]

If you have smart kids who read a lot and are generally curious, have them go about their way. Encourage good grades to the best of their ability (get tutors if necessary), require involvement in 1 inside of school and 1 outside of school activity - whatever they choose - it's their choice, and encourage active relationships with the teacher (including active participation).

In Jan of junior year, write out all activities, favorite teachers, favorite hobbies, and apply to some summer programs. Work on essays over the summer and make sure at least 3-4 activities align with the major (you don't pick the major in advance - look at your lists of activities, classes, and teachers to see where the natural and authentic alignment exists), then make a list of schools. Include 10 or so reach schools in RD if your kid is ambitious and aiming for T20.

Followed this for 2 kids so far. 
Ivy (pt job forever for this one)
and 
T10.

Absolutely no "curation". Allowed their natural interests to come through. And their supplemental essays were filled with intellectual curiosity because they actually cared/lived those interests.
[/quote]
+1. And this advice also works if kid is not a big reader! We followed a similar path and kid at an ivy. Leaned into and supported kid's natural aptitudes and interests (academic and outside school). Prioritized school, involvement, and teacher relationships. Head of 1 club but no major in school leadership titles. Didn’t force higest rigor in every subject. Found programs that fit kid's interests.  Made thoughtful choices, not expensive programs. But we were engaged. Plenty of friends hire outside help (and that's ok),  but I felt I knew my kid best and I was was interested, willing and able to put in the work to research and learn about the process.[/quote]

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