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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Mean is subjective.  What exactly are the girls and moms doing you find to be so mean, OP? [/quote]

- Excluding other girls
- Making fun of other girls or boys (verbally or in notes/pictures that are passed around the classroom)
- Telling kids not to play with or be friends with certain girls or boys.

It feels weird to be an adult referring to a 9 year old as a “mean girl.”  I don’t think they are bad kids.  They are just navigating the culture of the classroom in a way that works best for them.  
I don’t think the moms are bad people either.  They don’t deliberately set out to hurt people.  They just see the world in terms of these social hierarchies and are trying to come out on top.  
[/quote]

I’m a high school teacher and to some degree all of these behaviors are typical and age appropriate all through k-12. (Excluding extremes such as bullying but that’s not what you’re describing.) [/quote]

They may be typical at a certain age, but using the word "appropriate" when it comes to them and saying they are not bullying is BS!!!!

Excluding, making fun of, or telling other kids not to play with a specific person is, in fact, classic bullying.

I would hate to know what you think qualifies as bullying.

Some teacher you must be.  The ultimate useless bystander.[/quote]

Please know the difference between “appropriate” and “age appropriate.” [/quote]

Pls know the appropriate adult response to a kid bullying another kid is to first protect the kid being bullied.

[/quote]

My post clearly said this does NOT apply to actual bullying, which of course parents and teachers will immediately address. But not everything that parents call “mean girl” behavior is bullying (not even close) and most of it is age appropriate and just normal kid behavior. [/quote]

Some of us disagree vehemently that the things listed are "normal" or "age-appropriate" behaviors.  I know plenty of girls who did not behave that way, esp. not in middle or high school, because we had parents that taught us that kind of behavior was not acceptable.  Kids in middle and high school KNOW when they are being mean.  Condoning being mean as part of growing up is flat out BS.[/quote]

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