Reply to Open Marriage with kids

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Open Marriage with kids"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My late MIL (who I really liked as a person in the DIL/MIL capacity) divorced my FIL 15 years before I met her because she didn't want to be monogamy, polyamorous and wanted an open marriage/polyamory (and FIL did not). The entire time I knew her she was in multiple relationships that seemed really weird to me but she wasn't my mother and for the longest time my DH was in denial as to what she was doing.

My SIL however was traumatized by it, and the full effects from it really weren't apparent until about 10 years ago when she had a severe mental break and was committed. When my inlaws divorced my SIL lived with her mother (my MIL) who apparently brought home multiple partners (whether at their residence or even on vacations), exposed her in sound (and sight) to her sexual encounters (so she heard and saw things), would have histrionic episodes on what love means, how she needs to live her life according to her own terms, needs to be free, etc.  My DH, who is much older than my SIL, was pretty much out of the home at this point and at college, so while he knew his mom had lots of boyfriends/girlfriends he didn't know to what extent.

SIL became a cutter, anorexic, severely depressed. Being exposed to hyper sexuality is a trauma. My MIL calmed down a bit by the time I met her, and as soon as my SIL could leave the house she did and never looked back. When MIL died all these anxieties and stories from SIL came out. She's had electric shock therapy, all (and I mean ALL) the SSRIs, talk therapy, even spent months at Sheppard Pratt $$$. She's still very messed up.

You don't need to expose your kids to your sexual escapades, whether you are polyamorous or monogamous. If you feel this burning desire, that's on you. Your children aren't here to satiate your attention needs. Please, leave them out of it.[/quote]

Unfortunately I think personality disorders are often co-concurrent with people who pursue open marriages or who lack the emotional maturity to parent well. So those kids have to deal with not only the disruption of open marriage, but often the trauma of a parent who is abusive or neglectful.[/quote]

They are and histrionic personality disorder in the children is very common.  These children go on to cheat A LOT in their marriages.  The parent's behavior does a real number on them.  It's very sad and so traumatic. It becomes generational trauma that keeps getting passed on.  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics