Reply to I can’t do this anymore. I think I am having a mental meltdown

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

I am talking about unpaid leave.  
If you aren’t taking any time off because you can’t afford to, then you have my sympathies.  I am specifically addressing those people who don’t need to work, could stay home, but choose not to because SAHPs are whatever awful thing (stupid, lazy, boring, childlike, etc.).  It’s a pretty vocal and particularly nasty contingent on this board.  
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I know you're not actually looking to understand, but I'll bite. I work because I enjoy my work and did not enjoy being a SAHM the few months I tried it. I am high enough up in my organization that I cannot just stop working for a few months with no notice. I had months to prepare for my maternity leave and still checked in from time to time. There is no time to train other employees to take over my work and they are also overwhelmed with homeschooling and caring for their children. When I was on maternity leave, they were in the office and their kids were in daycare and school. And honestly, if I were in an accident, I'd likely be calling into meetings and teleworking as soon as possible - with my kids in school and daycare. This situation that we're currently in is like no other.[/quote]

I get that somewhat.  That is why I am still working part time.  But if you need to take time off, it's ok.  You don't have to push yourself to the point of breakdown.  
I was doing a fellowship in child psychiatry when my oldest child was diagnosed with leukemia, and I felt like I couldn't take time off.  If I left the fellowship, there wouldn't be enough fellows, and the program was at risk of losing funding from the ACGME.  I also had a research project and several things I was doing that seemed very important at the time.  I was really trying to figure out how I could be with my child the way that he needed me to AND continue what I was doing at work.  
One of my mentors, a child psychoanalyst whom I respected very much, pulled me aside and told me "you're not as important here as you think you are.  If you had a stroke tomorrow, this place would keep on running."  And he told me to go and be with my child.  So I left.  People were mad, they wouldn't offer me a job a few months later when I was looking for part time work.  But the fellowship still exists.  It didn't go under.  People adjusted.  I actually went back and finished my fellowship a couple of years later, something I was told that I would never be able to do.

Probably, there are people you work with who have a spouse who is out of work and managing most of the childcare, or don't have children, or have older children who are out of the home.  Other people can take over some of what you are doing.  Or some of it can go undone.  What would happen if you died?  If you had a stroke?  If you were hit by a bus?  People would adjust.  If you need to take time off, you can.

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