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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]That we really, really do not yet live in a society with gender equality. Workplace policies and cultural expectations both push women to be the default parent. You can maintain the illusion of gender equality until you have kids. Then you realize we’re still basically in the 1950s. (How many men know the names of their kids‘ doctors and dentists and teachers and classmates?  Some. But not most. How many women? All of us).

The inequality is very depressing. [/quote]

I'm not saying that everybody can do this but both my H and I took a hit at income to be flexible and we both did everything.

When my H would take off for  a sick kid his boss would say, "what is wrong with your wife"... he would say "nothing, I unlike you like my kids and want to be there for them" or many variations of the same type of comment.

Actually, my doctor once said to me..."oh there is a mom" ... I said, "that is very rude, I married a competent H and you are shaming me for it?" He did apologize and was very sorry and said, he has to get use to the new way us young kids do things. [/quote]

Same.

My work was surprised when I didn't take time off when our DD was sick, because DH could do it.  He also did pick-ups and drop offs to school, and was the only dad doing it.  Our DD is 15 now and has very fond memories of this, because it made her special in her class.  They are still very close.
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