Reply to DD bullied for wearing off-brand clothes.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm really surprised at the responses on here basically telling Op to help her DD cave to peer pressure.  What happens when your kid is made fun of for not doing shots at the party, or not trying the bong hit?  
I would speak tot he school about the bullying.  The school needs to tell the kids to stop it.
I would give my DD a budget for clothes and let her decide what to get with it.
[b]I would also take my kid to some volunteer opportunities so she can see what it's like to worry about having clothes or food at all, never mind name brands.[/b]

[/quote]

My DD does these things all the time (volunteering). She still wants some name brand clothes. Just a few, not a lot.
It's not wrong to have some things that you would like.[/quote]

The issue is the daughter expresses wanting them BECAUSE she is bullied or because she wants to fit in. I think its the 100% total wrong response to then immediately go out and buy it. IT justifies the bullies. It tells your daughter there was something wrong with how she dresses and they were right. If it causes her to fit in, it then allows her to be complacent when the bullies find a new target and perhaps even encourage her to join in. What about the next kid that truly can't afford it?

I'm not against giving my kid brands she wants for birthdays and Christmas. Maybe even a choice item or two when we go school clothes shopping. But she gets 90% sensible basics from me and she knows it. In May, at the end of the school year, just because girls have turned catty because the weathers suddenly warmer she needs something obviously branded? hell no. When she makes her own money, she can buy what she wants.

Even the fact that you've considered it is probably sending her the message that the bullies have a point. You need to be fierce. Talk to her about class and money and why she wants what she wants. Tell her she is beautiful and her clothes fit and look nice and you will not tolerate hearing about teasing because of clothes ever. If you just give in and buy it, you're part of the problem.

Go buy her a nice maxi skirt that looks awesome or new sandals or something those dumb kids have never even thought of if you really want to boost her confidence. something she likes because it looks good. Take her to a thrift store and let her try on tons of stuff. Invite a nice girls from school to go walk in the woods and climb to the top of the mountain and post it on facebook.

Redirect, ignore, do more awesome stuff that has nothing to do with money. [/quote]

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