Reply to Can we STOP talking about the kids?!?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I was in this position. My wife going back to work part-time helped tremendously.

I also get the stress of having a special needs child, OP. You need to think about that because it's a lot to manage. What do YOU do to help manage your child's condition? Before saying, well, I work, that's not enough. You really need to understand that your wife's load is heavier because of this and she needs someone to talk through and help process the crazy world that is raising a special needs child. It's lonely, it's overwhelming, and just saying let's not talk about the kids is akin to saying I don't care that you need to talk through this to feel closer to me, date night is on my terms. Not the greatest move, man.

I would focus on two things. First, helping your wife reclaim a little life for herself. Working, volunteering, etc. Get a sitter a few days a week to help after school.

Second, I would step up and get more involved with your kids, particularly your special needs child. It's a lot to handle, dude.[/quote]

How do I push her to go back to work part-time?  Any suggestions from SAHMs on what to say and what not to say?[/quote]

I worked part time when I was a SAHM (OK, so those two things are mutually exclusive), but I am SOOOO glad I did because work was sanity, kids were much much harder than work. By a thousand time.

This is difficult. Has she brought up the topic at all? Working, needing to get away from kids for a while, needing a break? Could you start the topic by finding some good childcare resources for kids, and maybe find benefits for the children of being in group settings? You can come at it from the "this is best for the kids" angle.

How about you just ask her. Would you like to go back to work part time? Get out of the house and be with intellectual peers?

I can see this exploding and you'll never have sex again, or she'll grab it with two fists and go forth and never look back[/quote]

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