Reply to Why do men allow themselves to be jerked around?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I really don't understand why you are so invested in this relationship. It is not appropriate, and it would be inappropriate even if you were his sister.

You are expecting:

- she will drive 4 hours late at night to hand-hold him in the hospital 
- she will leave her child to do this

Those are not reasonable expectations, particularly as, if you flip the situation around, your "friend" has a very involved "friend" who lives close by and can hand-hold in late night emergencies.

I think something else is going on here.[/quote]

Sorry there is no sorted story behind this. I have know him for >5yrs and seen him go through some rough stuff concerning women and no he isn't exactly a brain surgeon when it comes to women. He has flown across country for her and spent money he didn't have to do this. He has done so much for her I don't think putting your child in good hands to go be with the man you are talking about getting engaged to is to much to ask. Him and his son could soon be her immediate family soon. Go see what you can do for them, how about some sacrifice on her part.[/quote]

You don't know her, OP. It's not your business. It is completely inappropriate for you to micromanage his romantic life, regardless of his ability to manage his own. You admit you've never met this woman, so you have no idea what sacrifices she makes or what kind of commitment she actually wants from him. Your vehemence on this subject is inappropriate. Learn how to establish healthy boundaries.[/quote]

You missed the part where I said I was venting and writing on DCUM is as much meddling as I am ever intending to do. It is completely so not my business.  I am completely supportive to him about this relationship if this is what he wants then I am happy for him. I guess I am feeling like I see a friend walking over a cliff while he is looking the other way and there is no way for me to warn him "watch out for that cliff"
[/quote]

Nah, you're not completely supportive of him about this relationship. You think she's jerking him around and just described their relationship as "walking over a cliff." I don't think you're supportive at all. [/quote]

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