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[quote=Anonymous]Wow, OP, I could have written this, almost exactly.  I've been married 4 years and we have a 3 year old.  This has been going on around 2-3 years.  There were no huge red flags when we were dating (4 years) except that he listened to Howard Stern and liked some comedians who I found offensive...which was for sure a yellow flag, but since I saw no signs of misogyny and racism, it wasn't a complete deal breaker.  He was a Democrat, seemingly a decent person in terms of feminism and diversity.

Now...he's full-on Trump.  Social media is partly to blame, I think...he immersed himself in the alt-right Twitterverse and I swear he has been brainwashed.  Or abducted by aliens who stole his decency.

His only concession to the presence of our 3 year old is that he won't use the n-word in front of him.  And I had to demand that...like, it wasn't obvious!

I can't say he goes around ranting in public, but he does rant in private and it is vile.  He has a loathing for "social justice warriors"...basically, everything I stand for.  He seriously says he feels oppressed as a white man in our society.  It's sick.  And it's weird...I thought Howard Stern was bad years ago, but now my DH thinks he's a pussy.. He's listening to these extreme right podcasts now instead.

I hear the Folks saying "divorce him" and I think I'd say the same to a stranger in the same circumstance.  But I'm with OP in not wanting to leave my child alone with him.  And honestly I'm sure I could not win more than 50/50 custody (he is a very involved dad and our child adores him).  And honestly I don't have the courage of heart to contemplate giving up half of the days with my child.  I just can't right now.  But I hear what people are saying about creating a line in the sand and showing its not tolerable.  Luckily, I do not fear speaking up when he says out of line shit. But it still feels unreal to me.  Like he has a brain tumor or something.  This is not the man I married.

He changed so drastically, so quickly that I have some small hope that somehow he can come back to sanity and decency.  [/quote]

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