Reply to please tell me about living accommodations during separation--"sharing" your home and a rental?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm blown away by the negative comments towards OP.  She has been a SAH mom for 18 years.  Jobs don't grown on trees -- she's not going to jump into one.

She has been a SAH mom.  It's great that her husband is such an active and involved father, but that certainly doesn't diminish the years that she's spent raising four children.

There may have been some abuse along the way, and now OP has had it.  Counseling - absolutely.  But what the hell is wrong with you people?  Give her a break. [/quote]

Op is getting shit because she came in here admitting she has 4 kids, three of whom are older, for whom her husband does a LOT of the runaround stuff and yet she is just gob smacked that because of this and how she wants the divorce, she should move out and pay for an apartment. Yes it will lower her standard of living, that's divorce. She chose to have 4 kids and SAHM for 18 years and is now surprised that she can't request a divorce, stay in the house, work when and if it suits her and pays what she wants, and her DH can just deal.

Also, she was all fine to sit around for awhile to work on "training" to get a good job but when she got blowback suddenly he was abusive. Nah. People leaving abusive relationships lead up front that the relationship is abusive. Not toss in vague references to it when things aren't going their way. Being told to get a job and handle your kids' activities isn't emotional/verbal abuse. [/quote]

Wow.   You are unreal.

Of course I know I will have a lower standard of living with a divorce.   What I do not expect, nor will I accept, is to be forced into a studio apartment so my kids can "take turns one or two at a time" camping out on the floor with blankets, while their Dad stays in a comfortable 5 bedroom suburban home.

You act as though my husband has been BEGGING me to get a job for 18 years  and I just sat on my butt, when in fact it has been the EXACT opposite.   For what it's worth, my husband has been career military most of our marriage.   He had asked me, and I agreed, to be a SAHM so our kids would have the most stability during moves, deployments, etc.  I agreed to SACRIFICE my own career ambitions and goals for the sake of my husband's career and what I believed to be my family's best interest.   And now you throw it in my face as if I have been lazy and selfish for all these years.
Shame on you.

I haven't provided all the details of my situation because I really didn't think they mattered.  I didn't ask what people thought of me being a SAHM.  I didn't ask what people thought of who and how should transport my kids to their extracuricular activities.   I didn't ask for people to speculate on if and how I have been verbally or physically abused. 
What I DID ask, is if anyone has been in a situation where they kept  the home they owned, but also rented an apartment and the separating couple took turns in who lived where.   That is all.
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