Reply to Disappointed in DD, can I say anything to her?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I wouldn't say anything about her behavior.  I would talk to her about what she's going through, express empathy, maybe do something special with her.  Emphasize that your proud of her regardless of her job search.  Help her feel better, she'll treat others better.  [b]It's hard to celebrate someone else's success when you are going through a rough patch.  Yes, it's petty, but even adults have a hard time.[/b]  Praise any positive interactions you see between the two![/quote]

Give me a break. Just because it's hard doesn't mean it shouldn't be done. This young woman isn't going to have many friends in life if she can't be gracious about others' successes and good news. OP should absolutely say something to her DD -- it's a lesson that needs to be learned. I disagree with PP above that an entire generation is going down the tubes, though. There are plenty of empathetic and hard-working young adults around who know what it means to fail and to feel bad. [/quote]

Yes, but a vast majority of them do not.

Ask any teacher or coach who works with teens. Ask college professors about the change in the "self esteeme" level of young adults as a group and of their inability to deal with anynegative reaction at all.[/quote]

I'm a college professor and although some people of this generation are astonished to receive honest feedback, they want and need it.

I wish every parent would speak honestly with their kids; that they'd set high but transparent and clear standards and hold their children to them; that they'd be more interested in helping their offspring develop the tools to succeed than doing things for them and helping them build a resumé that only reflects someone else's effort.

The 18-22 year olds with whom I work daily are surprised by high standards and demands for independence but they overwhelmingly want to grow up and cut it. Unfortunately for them, they have to spend half of their energy freshman year just learning to suck it up and be the kid I was at 17 my freshman year.

That's on their parents. They have not even  been offered the chance to sink or swim. Ever. [/quote]

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