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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]wow. are you sure to want to stay married? I'm sorry. I could NOT TOLERATE someone telling me how to parents, and in SUCH ridiculous exacting terms.

I was all set to say "oh! my husband had OCD issues too!" but then i read your message, and that is not OCD. that is 100% controlling and could easily turn worse.  I'm sorry OP! [/quote]

I wonder sometimes. I can't tolerate it sometimes. Its like death by a thousand paper cuts. I take refuge in work or running. Here's the thing, he's not physically abusive, he doesn't use foul language, and he will never have an affair (see rigid moral values).    So...pretty sure we'll end up with a joint custody situation, am I right? So that means my kids will have to deal with the perfectionist attitude on their own, half the time, without me to balance it out? Ugh.

Just not sure what's the right choice here. I get that he loves me in his own weird way. He asks for my opinion before he makes any career choice. He often listens to me - or at least, it feels like we've made the decision together. He'll get my preferences if we're buying something, more often just going with what I want (say new wood paneling in our guest bathroom or whatever). He remembers (before me) all our first "days" (first date, proposal, etc.). He's very complimentary of my appearance, and my career/intellect, although in general he doesn't comment on people's appearances or how much money they make. But boy, will he notice if he's at your house and you've put something recyclable in the trash! He'll definitely comment to me about that later, aghast.

Thanks for everyone's support. I called my therapist and said I need to see her weekly (not every other week) and am seeing her tomorrow, and I and talked to my PCP and asked for an SSRI. I've never been on one before, but I've been feeling so very down about this lately that I've been dreading waking up every morning.  She's given my a referral for a psychiatrist so we'll see. [/quote]

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