Reply to grandparents of SN kids

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Reply to "grandparents of SN kids"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is not so an SN issue.  There are grandparents who really want to be involved and those who don't.  Reading about all the other unhelpful ones online makes me feel better about my own situation.[/quote]

It is an SN issue when the grandparents treat every other grandchild completely differently. [/quote]

My parents has trouble learning how to relate to my ASD child.  Her older NT sibling would bring her grandparents books to read and ask to play tea party, etc.  Frankly, looking back at the two as infants, the NT child would let anyone hold her (and the grandparents did lots), but my ASD child would scream if it wasn't mommy.  Over time the default was to be a grandparent to one sibling over the other.  No ill will was meant.

Over time we've gotten past this, for the most part.  My parent (other has since deceased) has come to relate to them both.  But it took some frank (yet understanding) conversations, and some tips.  Plus some alone time without the NT child dominating all the conversation.

Similar dynamic plays out with uncles/aunts, etc.  nobody is trying to exclude my ASD child.  Luckily it happens a lot less than it used to.

I want my SN child to have special meaningful relationships with her extended family.  They don't have to look the same as her NT sibling, just be authentic and meaningful.

But I don't ask for "help" from my family.[/quote]

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