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[quote=Anonymous]I was sexually abused as a child by my father. A year later there was a divorce, with some domestic violence, substance abuse and adultry thrown in. 30 years later, while I was working with a therapist, I finally told my mother, and it was enormously helpful in healing. I didn't go into details. I basically said, I need you know I was molested over this period of time, but I don't want to discuss specifics, or talk about this in the future. And was surprised when she said that this explained a lot about my behavior at the time. In my case, it was enormously helpful to get the acknowledgement. If she had denied that it could have happened, though, it would have been tough to deal with. And we haven't talked about it since.

I think every abuse victim gets a lot of latitude in how, when and if they discuss the abuse. You need to make the decision that is right for you. Which may be different than the decision that is right for your brother. And I encourage you to talk to a therapist who specializes in childhood trauma before you do anything. Not just to deal with your feelings about the abuse and a plan to deal with your stepfather now-- although these are helpful.  But also to work out what is right for you, and decide whether you can deal with the possibility your mother won't believe you. [/quote]

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