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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If they aren't turning you down, your hurt feelings are basically your own fault.[/quote]

[b]Well, I don't usually ask them for work reasons [/b](my husband has a lot of flexibility) but they do turn us down quite often if we ask for personal/social reasons. They keep an active social calendar booked way in advance but seem only willing to cancel their activities for SIL.

But as I write this I am realizing my real issue is that I feel like in general about everything SIL gets her way above all else. It's more about that than the babysitting. Just writing it down made me see that.[/quote]

That might be part of it, backup daycare is different than date night.  It is usually last minute when childcare options are very limited/nonexistent. Missing work is a bigger deal than missing date night.  Not that date night isn't important.

It could also be a mother-daughter thing.  My mom is more comfortable in my home and taking care of my DC than she is with my brother's family.  She has a good relationship with them and cares for my niece and nephew all the time but it's not as organic.  She raised me, I do things like her, my thought process is like hers, she if comfortable making judgment calls because she is confidant I would make a similar one.  For example if my DC had a fever she would take care of it, call the doc if it was high, medicate as she saw fit, etc. I trust her to do the right thing.  If my nephew had a fever she'd feel compelled to call and ask.  Nothing wrong with that but caring for my DC is just a little easier on every level including my "management" of her as a care giver. [/quote]

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