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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Thank you, guys, these are all great suggestions, and I plan to use them. (Except for one, you know who you are).

I feel bad for her, and I worry that I will become the same way. I feel like it is genetic in a way. Her whole side seems to be very "woe is me"/"I have the hardest life ever. " I do love her and she was/is a good mom in many ways, which is why I want her to feel ok. But I feel that she places her happiness in the hands of others, mainly myself, and it's a very heavy burden to bear, especially since I am myself trying to just keep my head above water with small children, a full time job and health issues. And of course, I am the type of person who is affected very easily by others' moods (is there a scientific classification for that?), so it's all just a perfect, crappy storm.

[/quote]

The issue is, she is not mothering you, and she should be.  I don't know if she is capable of that.  You might feel like you are missing out, understandably.  But IRL, there is only so much you can do to help her, OP.  Unless you are a certified professional, which I take you are not.  And, she might be playing you, since you are a captive audience.

You will NOT be like her, because you know HOW to not be like her! [/quote]

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