Reply to Moving out with two kids for trial separation, do i need a lawyer first?

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[quote=Anonymous]If you are able to work it out informally, you can do that.  Speaking with a lawyer before you leave the house is a wise thing to do -- they won't be able to help you figure out custody right now, but they can advise you on what to take with you, how much money to take out of joint accounts, etc.

My ex and I met with a therapist who specialized in divorce and custody cases. I had seen her a couple of times on the recommendation of my divorce lawyer.  She helped us figure out custody in about one hour.  She knows what the courts typically decide, she knows what the most common types of custody splits look like, and she knows what will have the least negative impacts on the kids.

When you come up with an informal arrangement, it is just that -- informal.  You don't need to draw up a legal agreement right away concerning visitation if you can both come to an agreement yourselves.  Many times, the custody will change significantly from your first agreement.

Many men say that want to see their kids every day.  Often they back off pretty quickly and get into a more regular patten several days a week and then every other weekend.

Good luck to you, OP.  Use the time by yourself (when spouse has the kids to pamper yourself).  Watch TV, read a book, work on a project, etc.  You will come to appreciate the break from the kids.  I would suggest that you take M, T and he takes W, TH and then every other weekend you each get F, S, Sun.  That means the kids only move between houses once per week.  It will be hard at first, but you will both adapt.

YOU CAN DO THIS! Keep in mind that the well being of your kids should be your primary focus as you make decisions with your ex.  Leave your animosity for him at the door, and give a little.  Hopefully, he can do the same.

I do agree with the others, that you should wait until the New Year to move...[/quote]

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