Reply to Wife nearly died. Angry with underwhelming response from her family

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[quote=Anonymous]I truly can relate to this as this was my family when one of my twins was dying (she died at just under a year so one baby at home/one in hospital.) It was so bad that I at times turned down some of the very much needed help that friends/neighbors - even strangers from the Parents of Multiples offered without hesitation because I was so shocked and embarrassed how my MANY family members in town (so not far away like yours) did nothing beyond a short self serving visit once over the 6 months she was in PICU -with  no questions as to how we were managing to take care of both BABIES, no offers of meals, groceries, basic errands. This was so mind blowing that while I contemplated 'confronting' their total lack of basic decency I knew I could not as my anger was so deep. I'm glad in the end I didn't as I would have go so far overboard they would have found comfort in the insane level I would have succumbed to had I let my disgust/anger unleashed (yeah still not over it - I have never been able to forgive some of the family-including a SIL, a mother of children too who never even called to say 'hey that sucks'.) They are not worthy of your thoughts. Do not discount too that you, most likely your wife, maybe your kids too are affected by something close to traumatic stress. As hard as it may be try and remove yourself from the anger as you know your family needs to focus on healing. It is terribly sad that those we thought we could count on let us down but I bet like me there were people who stepped up in ways you could never had imagined.
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