Reply to Is it Fair to Say That Both Parties Are to Blame in the Demise of a Marriage?

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Reply to "Is it Fair to Say That Both Parties Are to Blame in the Demise of a Marriage? "

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]That sounds like victim blaming to me. The person who had the affair created the problem. They get the blame.[/quote]

What drove him/her to have an affair?[/quote]

If it bad enough to for you to seek others, it is bad enough to get a divorce first. [/quote]

[b]And if it is bad enough to divorce first, aren't both parties to blame?[/b][/quote]
With this logic, a divorce that happens pre-affair would be both parties' fault, but a divorce that happened post-affair would be the cheating spouse's fault.[/quote]

exactly, and the cheated-upon partner gets to be the saint in the whole mess.

people, treat your spouses right.  it is very hard to undo what has already been done.  [/quote]
The cheated upon partner SHOULD be more respected in the whole mess.  They handled the mess much better than the cheater.[/quote]

Did they? If the cheated upon partner was mean, didn't contribute to the house and withheld sex, and the cheater was nice, paid the bills, did the cleaning, and took care of the kids, and banged a coworker on the side, the cheated upon should be more respected?[/quote]

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