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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have to co parent with the asshole. I would love never have to deal with him again, but I have to. It's the only reason for me living where I do. To be a parent. Make sense?[/quote]

So why are you wondering where the hell his girlfriend is when he's chatting another woman? Very weird.[/quote]

NP here. Really, if you divorced a man because he cheated on you, you would not think twice about that ex flirting with your friend while he has a gf - in other words, behaving unfaithfully again? If that really would not stick in your mind for at least a minute, I think THAT is abnormal. It is completely normal and human to hear or see things about an ex that echo problems in the marriage and reflect on it. IMO it's actually healthy. It's not about pining for him; it's about reflecting on the marriage and why it ended. Let's take the romantic aspect out of it. Let's say you divorced a man because he was a raging alcoholic and refused treatment. If your friend told you that she saw him out at a bar drunk and still pounding shots, wouldn't you reflect on that?

When you divorce, it really plays with your mind. No matter how much crap your ex threw at you, when you see how your kids are hurt by the divorce it makes you question whether things really were that bad. And then when you see new evidence that things really would still be that bad had you stayed, it confirms that you made the right decision and also helps you to understand what red flags to look for in future relationships. At least this is how it has been for me. 
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