Reply to I am considering becoming estranged from my parents

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm not trying to be mean but I think your dad is hilarious. He has my sense of humor. The car thing, I would forever tease you about that everytime you crossed the street. Maybe it's his way of loving you, by teasing you. [/quote]

Your kid gets hit by a car and you'd make fun of your kid for the rest of childhood that they don't know how to cross the street? That's disgusting.

OP, unless you're ready to sit out of wedding, funerals, and grandma's 80th birthday party, then I think quietly backing out of a direct relationship with your parents is a better move than proactively telling them that you're cutting them out of your life. If you simply stop engaging in one-on-one exchanges, then you will get what you want, but can politely exchange greetings and otherwise ignore each other at family functions. It puts everyone else in an awkward position when you announce that you're threw with your parents - now your siblings will have to choose who to invite to Christmas. If you're okay with that fall out, then go ahead. If you like to keep your siblings out of it, then just stop engaging with your parents - you'll run into them at family functions and that can be the extent of it. They won't be meaningfully involved in your life. [/quote]
It's not disgusting at all. It's just teasing and being funny. I get made fun of all the time especially by my dad because I got shot. I'm really bad at dodging bullets, it's like an inside joke. [/quote]

Here is the difference, PP: it is not possible to dodge a bullet. that is the joke. It's clear that whatever the intent, OP took her father's teasing as cruelty. That makes it cruel. I had a stepdad who teased a lot too, and I could take it, but my sister is still hurt by some of it. it's ok to tease kids if they can take it but not ok to tease them if they can't. It's the adult's job to not traumatize their kids, not the kids' job to toughen up.[/quote]

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