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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP posting. I've read through all the replies and have found some valuable information. Thank you.

I'm having a hard time coming to terms with an ex who I think is avoidant. I found the break-up very disturbing. He was very cold and dismissive during the break-up and am wondering who this "new" person is? I have had no contact from him since we broke up and the break-up itself was very superficial and very much a practicality. No feelings, no depth, no real explanations. Impersonal. I'm confused and am wondering : am I supposed to just accept that turn of events and leave it at that? Discarded. No value. 
He's moved on to someone else - who is married - and I'm left grieving while he has just replaced me and gone on with his life like I was never there in the first place. It is all so unbelievable.

Hi OP, I remember your earlier threads about your break-up. I'm sorry you're in so much pain. It seems you're having trouble getting out of this loop in your head of wondering why and how, why and how, again and again and again. The way that he has handled himself, both during your relationship and afterward, reflects his own deficits and not your own.

You talk about his detachment, from you, from his family and his own children. I dare say that the way the relationship ended and his current conduct should not come as a shock. You should not be scouring every memory of your time together for proof that you did or said something to cause him to discard you in this way - you should instead stop this endless loop in your head and just feel the pain and mourn the loss. That's the only way to get through it and move on.

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