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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My 11 yr old son, who has ADHD, and I were talking about the foster care system. It's not unusual that we get into discussions about serious issues. He overheard me and DH discussing thigns and wants to learn about it and join. He's always been a bit selfish and has what I think is an underdeveloped conscience. Like for example, the other day he broke something in the house yet blamed his little sister. It took a lot of prodding and then threats before he finally admitted he did it. We talked about how children in foster care often have a tough life, why, and how life is even harder sometimes after they age out. He abruptly asks me, "So does the government give a person money for taking in a foster child?" I answer "Yes, I do believe they do sometimes." "How much?" he asks. "I don't know" I answer. He then asks, "Why don't you take in a foster child so you can get more money?" I was appalled. He's a very bright kid who is developmentally very behind emotionally. Is there any hope? Anyone have a kid like this? [/quote]

OP, I have an 11 year old DS and frankly, I'm more concerned about you -- that you would think a statement like this was worthy of rushing to DCUM, calling his conscience "underdeveloped" and asking if there is any hope.

Do you have any sense of reality of what to expect from an 11 year old?[/quote]

Yeah, your kid is 11.  I don't think he was trying to be a jerk. He's just young.  He may have at some point heard you and DH discussing finances and just thought this could be one way to help out. His thinking - you like kids, the kids need a home and you need money.

I have a 12 year old girl who would NEVER say anything like this.  But then I have a 10 year old boy who is way out there sometimes.  I note this just to say, the OP probably has a pretty good sense or her son's emotional empathy levels.  Although she hasn't shared enough examples to convince all of you, my guess is she's around enough kids (hers or others) to recognize that her son is not demonstrating empathy as much as many others do.  All that said, I agree with the helpful posters above.  Some kids just get this stuff naturally, and others need a lot more TEACHING.  Just keep at it.

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