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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]"Random" is a good word.  I think a lot of what makes a marriage work, or not, has a lot of randomness to it - kids, no kids, stressful events, lucky breaks, good or bad health.  If you stick around for the long haul, it can change in ways you never expected and have little control over.

And I'm a couples therapist FWIW.[/quote]

This has been somewhat my experience bit perhaps with a different slant. I am a DH and frankly my first year of marriage was awful. Thought we would honeymoon; little to no sex, meddling MIL. I thought about divorce that first year and I was probably too young or not strong enough to face the hard decision. 
At around seven years in, no kids, no success getting pregnant,thinks good but not great. Same issues; thought about divorce but then wife got pregnant.
Kids make everything so hard. Part of the reason I didn't divorce early is that I didn't want to hurt DW. I also didn't want to be the one responsible for her not having children in this life.
Well, when times got tough in subsequent years, there wasn't enough of a foundation of love. And frankly I didn't like what I learned about DW during hard times.

we are still together as financially very difficult to separate. We have not been intimate in about five years and our marriage is full of resentment.

While this may not be on point to your question, if you have doubts address them early. And dont have kids or unprotected sex until they are resolved. My DW is not a bad person, but perhaps not the best fit for my life partner. And while I am sure I have changed, she really changed over the years - grew up poor. Once we had some money and met people with money she changed.

listen to that little voice. I should have; and don't worry what people will think - you don't owe anyone an explanation. And if they judge you well then they shouldn't be in your life.[/quote]

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