Reply to Local family not helping when DH was deployed

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP that sucks. You probably won't get much support here [u]do to the dislike of the military on this board[/u]. Talk to your husband your feelings are valid.  I would be annoyed by his constant presence.  He sounds young not selfish but you need to communicate. When people offer to help give them specific tasks.[/quote]

Uh, no.  A lot of us are military or former military.  Nobody likes a whiner.

Also:  due to the dislike.  Not do to.[/quote]
Agree. We're retired military. I wish my ILs would have helped when they said they would when my husband was deployed for 15 months. I didn't expect them to clean the gutters or babysit - but there was one week I asked for their help and they said no.  They had "offered" many times - anytime you need something, let us know... I had never asked for their help before and when I finally did after my husband had been gone a year the answer was no.  I had to let it go. 
Fwiw, OP, your BIL probably had no idea how to help, or what you needed, and was probably uncomfortable for whatever reason. Learn that many people offer but few actually help outside those that have been through deployments and understand.[/quote]

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