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[quote=Anonymous]My FIL moved in with my brother after MIL died, and the adjustment was difficult. It sounds like all of you -- including you, OP -- are making mistakes, and your father is suffering because of it.

My thoughts, based on my brother's experience:

1. Father needs his own space to relax with TV, computer, comfy chair, whatever he's used to. If you ned to buy furniture, let him pick it out. Remember Frasier's dad's crazy chair? That.

2. Father needs his own bathroom. This is just essential for an older person. My brother had his kids use the power room toilet/sink and the shower in their own master bath until they could renovate a second half-bath for FIL. Old people can't be expected to negotiate bathroom time with teenagers, that's just cruel.

3. Agree with PP about assigning permanent places for dad at the table, in front of the TV, in the car, etc. He should not be squeezing into the gaps left by your "real" family. His is part of your family now.

The crying is troubling, because it shows that he's very, very unhappy. You need to address that head on and find ways to change your life to include him in it.
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