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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't understand how this is bad or why that means they don't like you. Seems like a good thing to me. I get that it was a surprise and you didn't want them doing stuff you didn't know about or approve. But I have a couple bathrooms I'd like remodeled. Maybe they thought they were helping?[/quote]

Not OP, but the reason you don't understand this is that you most probably don't have emotionally abusive parents. Count yourself lucky that you don't.

It's hard to explain, but emotionally abusive people have a way to make it seem they're giving you a gift while it's really a way to tell you: "This aspect of your life is YET ONE MORE THING in which you're not up to standard. You can't pull your shit together. You're nothing without us".

My father tried to pull something like this on me, on a smaller scale, recently. He kept insisting I should buy a new cell phone, and that he'd pay for it. The reason why? The phone works perfectly, but the display is cracked. And I am NOT spending money to replace something that works perfectly, not am I going to give in to his power-play. He came clean one night as we were fighting about the effing phone and he told me that if he were me he'd be ashamed to use that phone around people because it has a cracked display. He's an emotionally abusive bully and I'll never be good enough to him.

BTW, I'm not ashamed to use a phone with a cracked display. To me, shame should be something you feel when you intentionally hurt another human being and/or violate his/her rights, or when you behave like a criminal.[/quote]

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