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[quote=Anonymous]

Perhaps you don't have a MIL problem, but a DH problem? Or maybe it's just your personal communication issue?

We all have ILs, and I imagine most of us have put our foot down at some point - DH and I and all my friends, at any rate. We are not the same age and come from all kinds of cultural backgrounds.

So what is stopping you exactly, from setting boundaries? Is your husband unwilling to say: "This year, Mom, we cannot host you. You'll have to stay at an hotel."? Are his parents actually going to show up at your door (in which case you would not open it because they would be beyond rude)?
I have said to DH: "I cannot host your mother more than X days". This is a woman I love, mind. And DH has told me many times he can't stand my mother, which I sympathize with, since she's quite difficult to live with. My parents have taken our hotel suggestion many times, since everyone is happier that way.

Either you present a united front with your husband, or you become the bad guy and do it all yourself. Those two solutions seem to me infinitely preferable to suffering a rude MIL for years, but it's your choice, OP.

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