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[quote=Anonymous]OP, it seems a lot of people here haven't experienced a relationship like the one you are talking about so their only response is 'move on, he doesn't want you, get therapy' but it's not quite that simple.

He very much wants you in his life. That's why he calls you constantly. That's why he's lying to you now. But the other huge thing here is that as much as he wants you in his life, he wants her more.

This hurts, because we always assume the reason someone wants someone else more is because they are better than us, or have something we don't, or we just aren't lovable. Well that's not always the case. Sometimes people choose another person for reasons completely other than love- you only need skim these forums to see evidence of that everywhere.

The bottom line is, he isn't who you want him to be. That sucks but the way he is handling this engagement should just solidify this for you. You can do better. You can still be his friend, but you need to get some distance for your own good- this situation is messing with your head and you can't be in two places at one time.

Take the difficult step and cut your friendship back, tell him to leave you be for awhile. Not because that will force him to tell you the truth, but because you need to change the dynamic between the two of you so YOU can be okay and move on and get your own fiancé. Best of luck to you![/quote]

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