Reply to I just don't know anymore

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[quote=Anonymous]Woah, this is not at all normal or acceptable.  I'm really concerned that you typed that you think it is your fault.  What he did is totally, completely out of bounds in a marriage and it is not at all your fault.

I think you need to let him know that you cannot stay in your town anymore.  You do not have friends or a support system or family there, and you need a better community to build a support system for when he is away with the reserves.  How long is his commitment to them?  Honestly, I cannot FATHOM my husband making such a commitment without consulting me.  We have a 15 month old baby and we wouldn't dream of making a commitment for a Saturday afternoon without talking to each other, much less something that would take us for weeks away from our family.

I think you have to tell him that this is a complete betrayal of your partnership and that you are not sure your marriage can be repaired, but that you hope it can.  He must commit to counseling.

I do think you need to see a counselor yourself.  If you have to take a few hours off each week to drive to an appointment, maybe your employer would let you flex this time?  You really, really need more support than you have now.[/quote]

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