Reply to Obligated to have visits with not nice in-laws when there is a new baby?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hi, OP here.  Thanks for the perspectives.  It really helped me see that we should definitely not invite MIL on our upcoming and much needed vacation!

I agree with the short, weekend visits concept.  It's just that I don't want her in our house, even for a weekend, and DH usually can't take the entire weekend off, so I don't want to entertain her myself.  But if we suggest a hotel she will have a hissy fit.  In the past we have stayed in a hotel when visiting her (because I don't want to stay with her) and she has had a hissy fit about that.  She is very against hotels when staying with family on principle.  However, she is a most unpleasant houseguest when staying with us!

She did make a comment about wanting us to come to visit her, and stay with her.  I don't want to stay with her and it would cause lots of drama and headaches if we come to see her and stay in a hotel, so it's not even worth going to visit.

[b]To her credit, even though she's a lousy MIL to me, she is an involved grandma to our son, so I would like them to have some sort of relationship, but it's hard to forget how she has treated me so far in our 10 year marriage.  She never asks about me, ignores my emails, didn't speak to us recently for 3 months, etc.  Just basically has always treated me as DH's friend, not his wife!  She doesn't treat DH well either.  [/b]

I think the best compromise is a weekend visit at a resort somewhere, either for Thanksgiving or another weekend, where she can visit with our son. [/quote]

Your son doesn't "need" a relationship with someone who treats his parents like this.[/quote]

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