Reply to My husband doesn't love me anymore - is this a sufficient reason for him to divorce me?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am confused by the advice on this thread.  The OP says she is "terrified" he will want a divorce and asks for advice.  The immediate responses are "talk to a lawyer", custody, alimony, etc.

How about:  "Talk to your husband about your concerns and your commitment to work though "better and worse" situations.  Tell him you still love him and you know he is having doubts.  Encourage him to go to marriage counseling with you so that the two of you can better understand each others feelings right now and work together to improve the marriage.   Emphasize that you both owe working things out to the kids in providing a stable family for them."

Wow, "divorce" is the word of the day on here.[/quote]

Well, divorce was the title of the thread. I posted earlier and I absolutely believe in working on a marriage - we've been through hell and back and are still married. We even separated - not my choice, but it takes two people to decide to work on a marriage and you can't force someone to stay. I interpreted the post as a prepping for divorce question. It doesn't mean they will divorce but she shouldn't stand idly by and assume she and her husband are on the same page. Preparing doesn't mean forcing the issue or going through with it, it just means empowering yourself so you aren't dependent on someone who may not be on the team.[/quote]

Because I wanted her to understand first and foremost that she is not powerless as her post implied. She needs to get the facts straight, empower herself, and realize she is going to be okay, before she can work on the marriage. Otherwise she is desperately holding onto him because she is afraid.

I'm a big believer that you need to empower yourself and work on your self first before you can work on a marriage, and op struck me as someone who needs a plan for herself regardless of her husband. If one person in the marriage changes, the dynamic changes. But I agree counseling is a great  first step.

Then why didn't you suggest counseling as a first step, since you are such as big advocate of saving a marriage?[/quote][/quote]

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