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[quote=Anonymous]My dad had an affair with his secretary.  I first recognized it when I was about 13.  I finally asked him about it when I was 16 and he denied it.  By this time, I knew my mom suspected but didn't know 100%.  Mom and Dad lived apart and together off and on for the next 15 years when my mom finally divorced him.  I loved my Dad so much, but I hated him for the pain he caused everyone, especially my mom who didn't deserve it.  My dad died recently and at the time of his death he was living with his mistress (and had been for a couple years).  He always maintained that they got together after my mom AND that he would never marry the other woman.  Found out after he died that they had been married.  There are so many other painful details to this story that I have left out but bottom line to me is that once you have children, the selfishness of an affair is a while different story.  I could never, ever hurt my own children the way my siblings and I hurt because of my Dad.  And we really did love him in so many ways.   [/quote]

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