Reply to Trying to decide about the magnet program at Eastern MS

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Reply to "Trying to decide about the magnet program at Eastern MS - any advice?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I just asked my Eastern eighth grader about the "fear and shame" thing.  His response:  He's never been made to feel fear and shame or seen anyone else treated that way.   He said:  You shouldn't go to Eastern if you're not willing to work hard, and sometimes it can be really hard, particularly the first semester of 7th grade when they do a large research paper.  There are some teachers who are really strict and ask a lot of the kids.  But you get through those parts and the rest is a lot of fun.[/quote]

[b]I have had many reports of the "fear and shame" approach from my child and from other children -- teachers who call the child stupid, who criticize the child for asking questions, who comment on girls' body (both too thin and too fat), and who discourage magnet students from being friendly with the comprehensive kids.  I can't count the number of times I've heard a story about a kid who broke down in tears.  At least once I have been concerned enough to consider whether I should mention the incident to the other child's parent.  These tactics have been directed at my DC and my DC's peers, so I am speaking from personal experience.  
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Equating these kinds of stories with the idea that teachers are simply "strict" and just asking students to "work hard," is equal, IMO, to being complicit in bullying.  I have no problem with strictness and working hard.  My child is getting straight As.  But, this kind of approach in teaching is unacceptable.  IMO, it is allowed at Eastern because parents do not complain, and even when they do, the administration does nothing.  Parents do not complain, because they don't hear enough about it from their kids, or they don't want to be seen as trouble-makers in the program and make kids' lives harder or get asked to leave.

OP, I'm glad you made the choice for Eastern.  It is a good environment for smart girls (and boys) in many ways.  But, keep the lines of communication open and speak up loudly when things are not going as they should.  Expectations for teachers at Eastern are very different from those at Westland.  Your instincts about the difference in environment between Westland and Eastern are correct, and you will need to have an ongoing discussion with your child to help manage this.  Neither choice is a perfect one.  You are choosing to gain some things and lose others.  The same would be true if you chose Westland.  [/quote]

These are really serious accusations.  Did you report them to anyone?  Is it a specific teacher?

It's just hard to imagine that I wouldn't have heard anything about something like this from my very social and plugged-in DC ... and have also never heard of kids getting asked to leave because they are seen as "troublemakers."  Well that's not totally true, but the case I'm thinking of was about 8 years ago and was a very specific case that was warranted, IMO.

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Personally felt pressured to leave the school, which we felt was due to prior complaints.  Won't say more because I don't not want to personally identify.   Just because YOU haven't heard that it has happened, doesn't mean it is does not happen.  When someone leaves it is generally attributed to the long commute" or alleged that they "couldn't handle the rigor of the program," but we know a number of people who have considered leaving due to the teaching/administrative atmosphere, and a few who actually have.  Personally know, from speaking with other parents, about a number of complaints made to various administrators about this kind of teacher behavior.  Many are related to one teacher, but it is not just one teacher. [/quote]

It's not that I don't believe you; I'm just surprised that I haven't heard anything about this type of behavior at all.  And my kid is an 8th grader, I know a lot of parents in the program ... also I don't know a single child who's left, so maybe I've just missed the whole thing.[/quote]

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