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Elementary School-Aged Kids
Reply to ""Because I'm Your Mother and I Said So!""
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Challenging adults is just a developmental thing and DC will outgrow it. Until then, you're just going to have put up with it. There's no magic way to get kids to stop doing this. Here's what I do with my two boys: Tell DC that sometimes you just have to do what the boss says and you are the boss. Let DC ask questions or challenge, but put a limit on it. Ie. "You can ask me "Why?" once, but once I explain "Why?," and we talk about it, then you need to stop arguing. Don't argue with the boss. When you have moved out, you can do it your way! Yay, for being a grown-up!" [/quote] I'd add that I don't think asking "why" is bratty and I don't think getting an explanation is rewarding bratty behavior. I want my kids to question and understand, not blindly follow leaders. That said, sometimes they just have to do what the boss says. [/quote] NP. Sorry, but I don't think that respecting adults, especially parents, is "blindly following leaders." [/quote] Respect is earned, not just given. Teaching, rather than demanding, is a much better way to get that respect.[/quote] I "earned" my kids respect thby carrying them for 9 months, pushing them out, allowing them to suck the life out of me and keeping them helathy and alive for 9 years. They owe me respect at this point as I have done nothing to warrant them "questioning" me ad nauseum when they just don't want to do something. This isn't about "learning" why, its a delay tactic and a pain in the ass. Adults who tolerate it are the problem. The kids are just the symptom.[/quote] It's not all about you, though. They are human beings, too. And they are kids, which means they can't be expected to know everything adults know or show the same type of adult judgment in any given situation. And yes, they are learning. What lesson are you teaching them? Obedience? Likely. Respect? I don't know. Your paragraph doesn't sound like a very admirable way to interact with someone. Discussing and teaching aren't signs, per se, that an adult is "tolerating" certain behavior from their kids. They are just working though it in a different way than you choose to. And yes, there are parents who set no expected standards of behavior for their kids, and that is a problem. But teaching discipline though discussion is not synonymous with that.[/quote]
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