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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It may be that she felt she needed to send your DD a gift this year because you had sent her DS something on his birthday.
Perhaps otherwise she would have emailed or sent a card, as she had in prior years, before she had her own child.
It wouldn't occur to me to get upset about how a gift was presented or delivered, and your kids would never notice unless they were picking up on your feelings.
I send Amazon gifts all the time, and if she's new to this, she may not have noticed the option to gift wrap or write a note.
It was thoughtful of her to send a gift - life is way to short to not let this go immediately, take a deep breath and enjoy the day.[/quote]

+1,000

OP, you are heading for years of resentments if this kind of thing is eating at you in the least. Can you try to focus on the fact she took some effort even to send a gift when she usually does not (and when she has a young child, and might have had things going on at home about which you know absolutely nothing).

Why does it matter so much to you if she didn't also send a card, or write a note, or wrap the gift, or get it sent to her and then nobly schlep out to the post office (baby in tow, of course) to mail it yet again just because that's "nicer" than sending it directly via the company where she bought it....Would it be more "sincere" as a gift if she had done all that?

What it comes down to is that she didn't do it the way you would have done it, and you think you are more sincere than she is. Maybe you're forgetting what it was like to do those kinds of things with a young kid on hand, or maybe her baby had a cold that week, or maybe she isn't as experienced a gift-giver as you are. But she did make an effort and you're dismissing it and overthinking it at the same time. Please don't let your kids see or hear your disappointment or they'll think the gift isn't good enough. Ingratitude is much worse than the supposedly "insincere" gift.

Sigh and roll your eyes about and say things like "Well, I guess she [i]meant[/i] well" and "Oh, it's too bad there's no card....." or "Gee, where's the wrapping? Oh, she had it sent directly to us...so no wrapping, sorry...." to your kids, if you want them to grow up feeling entitled and bruised if everyone doesn't meet mom's standards.[/quote]

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