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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We're not talking about making [b]your child her crutch[/b], just about a little more involvement and on your terms. [/quote]
But we're making the child her crutch, her crutch for feeling blue.

DH thinks she's lonely and bored and we should use our child to make her feel better.  Other than that she's not involved in child's life. We invite her to events and visit her weekly. But she never makes any effort herself.  When DC was an infant she never came over to help or visit.  We had to drag the baby to her house every week for visits with grandma. This continues on.  She never comes over to our house, never calls, and communicates rarely and only through DH.

She babysat overnight DC exactly once.  I asked her to babysit at our house over a long week-end when I was traveling. Because she's 70+ and forgets things I called in a SIL, for back-up.  The child got a stomach bug right away, throwing up and fever.  It was an Easter weekend and MIL spent it out, doing the church activities (leaving the sick child behind and taking the only car seat with her). SIL ended up watching the child most of the time.  MIL ignored my instructions and didn't call our ped instead was giving her some random meds.  I came back to a very sick child and we spent a whole week recovering from this fiasco. [/quote]

Yeah, no way would I ever have MIL provide overnight care after that.  Nope.

If you're seeing her weekly, I think that is plenty good enough.

You can't make her happy, that's the thing.  Taking your child over more often isn't going to solve her unhappiness...she's the only one who can really solver her unhappiness.[/quote]

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