Reply to Depression - Is it a cop out?

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Reply to "Depression - Is it a cop out?"

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[quote=Anonymous]OK I'll try to give some perspective as someone who has suffered from depression my whole life.  I'm not talking just minor mood swings and crying fits.  I mean debilitating, crippling, relationship destroying depression.

OP, I certainly understand where you are coming from.  Depression can appear like such a selfish disease to those who have the ability to pull themselves by the boot straps (like you).  It IS selfish to suffer from depression for extended period of time and not get treatment for it.  It can appear as laziness and a cop-out when you are unable to get out of bed and function.  Luckily, I've managed to "fake it" every time I had a major onset (meaning, I was able to get out of bed, go to work, care for my child, etc.). It doesn't mean that I did it well, but I did it.  I suffered from horrible post partum and begged my partner to take it seriously and be understanding while I worked through it.  He chose to leave.  To his credit, I was pretty difficult to be around (very angry and combative), but I kept telling him that I would get better. He didn't believe me (or in the fact that my depression was serious).  I got better, just as I thought i would, with meds and support from other people in my life.  I am beyond happy that I am able to be a mom that my son deserves and I think that my ex acted selfishly and prematurely in leaving.  Perhaps he could have had a good partner if he stuck around, but I understand now why it was hard.

All of this to say, you don't have to create excuses to people with depression, but I think calling it a cop out and "lazy" is not productive.  You can certainly require (as you should) that they get treatment and meds, and you don't have to neglect yourself in the process, but this is a sickness and it's certainly wasn't something I could just snap out of.

Just my experience. [/quote]

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