Reply to DH doesn't include me in decisions that affect us as a family

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Reply to "DH doesn't include me in decisions that affect us as a family"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.  I don't think I am being childish.  I drew a boundary -- the very advice some of you have given me.  Divorce is not an option for me.  Leaving him is not an option.  Regretting my decision to marry him and perhaps failing to heed red flags does not help me now.  [/quote]

If you didn't let him know there will be consequences, then you didn't draw a boundary.  That's what people are trying to tell you.

If you just say, "I want you to consult me; we're partners," but make it pretty clear that if he doesn't, you won't do anything about it, then he's not going to consult you.  From your own post, you have made clear that he has said he doesn't think he has to consult you and he's not willing to go to counseling to even reach a compromise.  He is the one who has drawn the boundary.

The reality is that there isn't anything you can do if you are unwilling to even tell him that you will leave if he doesn't compromise.  And the problem is that it is setting the stage for him to walk all over you for the rest of your lives together.

I have seen marriages like this.  If you don't nip stuff like this in the bud early on, it only gets worse.

You need to be willing to leave, and you need to communicate to him that there will be consequences if he doesn't include you.  If you want to be considered and equal and a partner, then you have to make it clear that if you aren't included and regarded as an equal and/or a partner, then you will walk (no matter how much you love him) because the vows, the arrangement, the promise, was to be a partnership.  [/quote]

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